Winter is Almost Here and So is My Boyfriend Fever

By: Rawan Khalil

Winter is here or almost here, it’s like around the corner if that makes sense. In other words, it’s getting colder- the cardigans, hoodies and sweaters are coming out of whatever potholes you buried them in. The hot chocolate tastes better than ever and of course dwelling over the fact that there is no snow to build a snowman but then some people complain about snow and you are not really sure but that’s not the point here. Also, it means midyears are very, very close like, dangerously close and timetables are being created- to not be followed but for the triumph of being created, and then there are piles and piles of notes yet to be studied and the key word here is yet, because the yet tends to last longer than it disappears- and it’s not revision for many it’s highkey studying.

But, after two weeks of the horror show and that is the exam season if you did not infer that- and it’s a horror show starring students, sorry, my bad zombies who are running on no sleep coffee and hell… there are way too many words to remember. After that, comes Christmas break. Lights are up, Christmas playlists blasting on maximum volume and sugar canes and gingerbread men everywhere. It’s basically the peak of winter season.

But, wait one second I am missing something. Oh, yes my boyfriend fever is back. Winter equated to cuddling and I do not want to cuddle with my blanket when I watch a christmas movie- like that’s just sad. I can cuddle with my friends I guess. Please do not pity me- I am not desperate it’s just like a flu. It will pass. But, the thing is now we have a problem- and by we I mean anyone in the same position as me. So, naturally once I noticed there might be a problem I grabbed my laptop for help. I opened google and typed in “Boyfriend Fever” expecting solutions, alternatives or stories. I basically expected something that was not Urban dictionary making me feel like a desperate, hopeless loser. So, scrolling down past that initial result and past the very odd pictures, and videos I was still optimistic. But, my dreams were crushed, to say the least- with the search results consisting of how to take care of your boyfriend when he has a fever.

Yes, exactly what I needed Google. You have failed to spy on me, interpret my feelings and give me ads about what I need which quite frankly is not food delivery- I don’t even know my address. And, I thought that was the internet’s main job, but not only that, Google just did not give me what I was looking for. 

I was disappointed, but I did not give up. I tried again trying to word my feelings in a better way for Google to understand me and so I typed in: “winter is here and so is my boyfriend fever” expecting nothing less than results this time. But, again I was met by disappointing results. For some odd reason there were kids health articles, there were Dos and Donts when you have a fever and a-let’s-call-her-Jessica complaining about her boyfriend’s daddy fever. 

Wow

What have I done to deserve this.

And, because I have a weird ass brain I thought Google might be taking this the wrong way. What if the algorithm just misread the signs- like no I am not flirting with you which now that I am typing it doesn’t make any sense and is actually quite hilarious but we are walking through my thought process.

I was still determined, and luckily for me the third time was the charm.

I changed my wording a lot and went for what I thought was a long shot. I thought a bit and I was like I do not want a boyfriend I want a fling- it’s not fair why are there summer flings but no winter flings. And, so that’s actually what I searched up: “winter fling”. And, of course, Urban Dictionary couldn’t resist being my first search result but then I saw it- exactly what I was looking for. 

YES!

YES!

YES!

She gets it- Her Campus gets it a little squeaky-ass voice in my brain pointed out. Then obviously I read the article and felt merry because someone gets it. Oddly, a couple of days later my boyfriend/fling fever was gone but well we gotta wait till the end of winter to make sure it’s gone for good and not just hiding.

There you have it a very odd boyfriend fever rant that doesn’t involve anyone’s temperature rising above 36.5-37.5 degrees Celsius. Well on that note I should probably go and finish studying Homeostasis and Excretion- isn’t learning about how sea water and freshwater fish excrete just delightful. 

Love,

Rawan 

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