The Biggest Ramadan Catastrophe: 3ozoomat

By: Salma Mourad

Having just gone back home from the biggest ramadan 3ozooma I’ve attended this month, I’ve decided to talk to you about them. Though luckily, this gathering was a perfect success, I’d love to share a few 3ozooma disasters that most likely happen in these types of “Ramadan Assemblies”.

The biggest disasters mostly happen in family 3ozoomat. From the food you don’t like that much, to the very weird family members you’ve never encountered before. Usually when we’re fasting, we’re craving everything, but as much as we really can eat anything, it’s not that great being forced to eat food you don’t like. Especially in Ramadan, since we’re so hungry. The problem with these types of 3ozoomat is that we sometimes don’t find anything we’d love to eat. Not just that, another horrible thing is having to wait in line to get the food, even after maghreb has already 2adden.

“Teita wallahi msh bakol bat”

“Khalto I don’t like hamam”

“3ammo wallahi msh 3ayza akl tany”

Let’s not forget about your mom’s third cousin’s neighbor’s aunt, who claims to have known you “men wenty aaaaadd keda”. 
“Ah tab3an ya tante”
“Tab ana meen?”
… Awkward silence till your mom swoops in and saves your ass. We’ve all been through this.

Even though they may be tiring, Ramadan 3ozoomat are somewhat special. They’re fun, and funny… till you start getting asked embarassing questions. About school, friends and weirdly even your love life. Aywa na3am fih eh?

Before going into your relative’s house, there are always instructions you have to follow. No ellet adab, no fighting with your younger sister and exercising proper etiquette. It’s a bit annoying having the rules listed every time, but you know, parents love to repeat themselves. As if saying it for the 50th time would make a difference. The most important thing is impressing the fam! 

We probably all don’t like having to greet every single member in the room, and being asked every time :”enty bent meen?” or “enta ebn meen?”

We love ramadan, we love our family, but sometimes things go wrong. Babies. They never stop crying. I really do love kids, don’t get me wrong, but sometimes it gets a bit too much. Children start fighting with each other, and every time something gets broken. Every single time. 

As much as we think disasters only happen in family gatherings, that’s not true at all. Even in gatherings with your class there’s a downfall of some sort. If you’re a girl on her period, the worst thing is for people around you to find out, especially when all the guys are immature. Imagine being at a friends house, and all your friends are invited. You’re not fasting, and without noticing you drink a cup of water. Before Maghreb. You’re embarassed, though it’s a pretty natural thing, but boys are boys :/

Ramadan is the time for family, friends and peace, so if you’re having a hard time adjusting to the disasters of gatherings, you gotta stay strong.
Don’t deny it, disasters are what make them fun.

Salma Mourad

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