The “I Want a Boyfriend/Girlfriend” Culture

By: Salma Mourad

How many times have you heard someone say : “Ana begad 3aiza asaheb” or “Eh howa mafish had nawy yeboselna wala eh?” Almost all of your friends are in a relationship, or on the way to it. Couples are everywhere. Everyone reacts to this differently; there are 3 types of people when met with sentences like these.

The first one is the one that is desperately searching for someone for their personal reasons; either they want to feel loved or they just feel bored, you never know, it could be anything in between too. Then there’s that type of person that gets disgusted; seeing two people being all cute together actually repulses them, or it’s just an act to hide the fact that they would actually love being in a relationship as well. They exaggerate how much they dislike it, to the extent where their dislike is evidently fake. The last one, is the person that has no reaction whatsoever. Or, their reaction is just hidden in their hearts. I actually like this one. Deep down, they wouldn’t mind being in a relationship, but they’re never desperately looking for one. Two people together could sometimes be really cute, but they don’t usually show it. They love love and are waiting for the right time and person to actually go for it. I’d love to say our generation has alot of the likes, but we don’t. It’s usually “I want a girlfriend. I want a boyfriend.” 

Okay, let me get this straight. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a partner. It’s absolutely in our nature to want the attention and love a relationship provides. The question is, why do we want to date? Why do some people so desperately want a relationship?

Lately I’ve seen so many people in relationships, that it’s starting to get weird. Again, nothing wrong with being in a relationship, but how do you expect my reaction to be when fifth graders at my school start dating? Fifth graders. What the hell do they know about love? What the hell do they know about life, even? Yes, they’re half my age, but I myself still don’t know anything. So many teenage hearts get broken, because many can’t seem to find the right person. At a young age, it won’t be easy. And that’s why rushing into anything is never a great decision.

If your whole group of friends is dating, and you’re the third or even the fifth wheel, you’ll always have the feeling of missing out. And to me, that’s why so many people are desperately looking for someone. How can everyone be in a relationship, but you’re single? Heck, you even start to question if you’re lovable. Personally, I don’t see any problem in being in a relationship before marriage. Yes, we don’t know anything about real love, but we have to experience anything close to it to know how to deal with similar situations in the future. How do you expect things to work out later on in life, if you’ve never experienced them before? 

Yes, we’re young and we probably won’t possess the same amout of love, but the slight problem is that we recently don’t even care who we’re in a relationship with. And that’s what’s bothering me. We want someone to fill up a void. Trouble at home, but at least someone else is pretending to love us. Feel left out, why not date to fit in, look cool? Out of boredom maybe, to have something to do in our lives? Guys feel strongly pressured, when all their friends are involved with girls and they’re not. Girls feel pressure too, because no family wants their daughter to be single for the rest of her life. It’s a preperation for marriage.

The I want a gf/bf culture has spread, and it’s causing more problems than you’d imagine. Girl’s hearts get broken, because it was all fun and games till she actually got attached, or young people being forced to do stuff they’d never do if it weren’t for “love”. It bothers me, to see people so desperately want something, when they could just wait for the right moment.

Let me say this one more time. If you’re 18, 17, 16, 15 or even younger, there’s nothing wrong with strongly liking someone or even loving them. You’ll get told you’re too young, and maybe you are, but you’ll never make it in love if you’ve never let yourself experience it at least once. There’s nothing wrong with being in a relationship, but set your priorites straight.

Do you actually like someone, or do you just want to distract yourself?

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