He Said He Loved Me

By: Hanna Haitham

he said he loved me
I recall as I take another shot
the familiar burn is in my veins
but nothing compares to this heartache
he said he loved me i think as I pop the pills
one by one I take them
chasing them with alcohol
he said he loved me
I hold back the tears;
they’re forming rivers in my brain
and I’m struggling to get past them
I drown in myself
he said he loved me
I think as memories chase me down like rabid dogs
I tried to run from them but they corner me in the dark halls of my mind
and they remind me of what could’ve been
but stupid girl he didn’t love you
you believed his lies to quench the thirst you have for a little love
you believed his lies because you wanted to
you were both lying, chasing a relationship because you’re scared to be lonely
you want a safety net, but that net crumbled
stupid girl, you both tried to find solace in each other’s broken pieces
the reason you were scared to walk away is because his embrace glues you together
stupid girl, how can he love you, when you don’t even love yourself?

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