I’ll Tell Myself I Healed You

By: Hana Haitham

lack of sleep
cutting ties
i close my eyes
slow breaths
i’m someone else
i need to decide
couldn’t fix you
couldn’t heal you
suffered behind lies
couldn’t face you
couldn’t love you
lost myself in the demons of your eyes
tried to help you
tried to heal you
i even took your problems and made them mine
you couldn’t trust me
broke me while you loved me
little pieces of you are still inside
couldn’t fix you when you pulled the trigger
tried to contain it but it just got bigger
couldn’t heal you
couldn’t heal me
at least you’re happy now
at least you’re free
so i’ll sit with the lies
and i’ll lay with the cheats
i’ll lose myself in lack of sleep
i’ll convince myself
that it’s true
i’ll tell myself
I healed you

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