The Basic Bleeding Vagina Help Guide – 5 Easy (lol) Steps to Comfort

By: Fadila

Periods are many things; they’re painful, annoying, messy, and even inconvenient. One thing they are not is shameful. We are taught from a young age that menstruating is somehow wrong, that periods are embarrassing, that we should keep them hidden, we should always remove any possible evidence of us having them, and the golden rule? never talk about it.Menstruation is completely natural, it is a normal biological function that takes place once a month, it is necessary, it is inevitable, yet somehow we’ve been conditioned to be ashamed of this completely natural process that we cannot change. Whether we like it or not – whether you like it or not – girls have periods and it is not a choice – fucking live with it. We’ve somehow created a connotation – a misunderstanding really, – of “she’s on her period”, that sentence is an observation, why do we automatically translate it into “stay away from her now she’s crazy” ? It has reached a point where we’re actually scared of flowing through our white/grey pants, or we feel embarrassed buying tampons or pads from the supermarket. That being said; let’s get down to it:

That week – especially the first 3 days – are absolute hell, your stomach feels like it is trying to tear itself up, your vagina is sensitive beyond belief to the point where you feel uncomfortable going to the restroom, your mood swings are lit – seriously – and it doesn’t help that your family find it funny (that honestly doesn’t help any), and your cravings? Lol, one second you would die to have some black forest cake the next you want a burger and curly fries, then some ice cream or pumpkin pie – lord knows momken eh tany. Girls, here’s how you can help yourself – and boys, here is how you can help your girl friends/girlfriends:

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1- Meet Your New Bestfriend  The Heat Pad aka The 2erba

Ring up the closest pharmacy – or your grandma – and ask for an erba, it’s a silicon like thing kda just boil some water and fill it up with it, then simply rest it on your tummy as you lay in bed, or during class, or even if you’re in the car, it’s super easy to carry around – you can deflate it any time and roll it up – and accessing hot water is pretty much available everywhere, there’s the school cafeteria, cafes, the kitchen, etc. Funfact: this is more effective than Advil according to one small study published in 2001 in Evidence-Based Nursing.

2- Drink Cinnamon Like You’d Die Without It

Every morning, replace your mug of coffee or nescafe with one of cinnamon, I know it doesn’t taste nice so here’s how to take the bite out of it; for every cup use half a teaspoon of cinnamon, 1 tbsp honey, and 2 teaspoons of milk, I promise two sips in your tummy will relax and the pain will alleviate shwayya.

 

3- Drop By The 3attar ASAP

I’d tell you to go to those boutiques in malls where they sell oils and shit but they’re expensive as fuck men gheir sabab, so drop by the 3attar and ask for a bottle of lavender oil ok? It won’t cost more than 20 LE, when you go home, pour a bit in your hands and massage it gently onto your lower abdomen in anticlockwise circles, within 10 minutes any leftover cramping will calm.

 

4- The Gym is Calling

Yes I know, you can’t get up, you feel like something is trying to crawl its way out of your tummy, your uterus is swollen, you’re fucking bleeding for God’s sake BUT put on some leggings kda w your favorite workout shirt and get your ass to the gym, exercise releases endorphins which boost the mood and chase away pain, fa get yourself up and you’re already halfway to a good pain-free mood.

 

5- Hot Hot Hot Soak

Fill up your bathtub with scalding water, add 3 tbsp of honey, 2 of your favorite scented oil and half a cup of milk if you’re feeling up to it (and if it goes well with your chosen oil), not only is this a period pain remedy, it’s also an overall muscle relaxant, so those kinks in your back and neck, that cramp down your legs? Will all be gone.

Remember that while your period is painful as hell, it isn’t a curse be l 3aks it’s a bloody blessing. Love yourself, take care of yourself.

 

 

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