Summer is when the heat rises, you go out more and you start wearing less (lowkey drake reference bas msh moshkela). As you wear less, your skin shows and your body is exposed to those around you and sadly enough there is a specific way you need to look in order to be smiled at instead of frowned upon.
The ideal body nowadays is quite simple; flat stomach, toned arms, toned legs, big boobs and big butt . However, you need to make sure that you are not too toned cause that will contradict to your femininity and will make you look like a man. Easy enough , right?
That is if you get paid to look a certain way and act a certain way. That is if you have a personal celebrity trainer and nutritionist. That is if your existence solemnly depends on pleasing people and looking good. That’s how simple it is.
Subconsciously when you see that the summer is near , you start googling ways to get abs, butt, bigger boobs, lose weight, have lighter skin, a whiter smile and so on and so on. If you’re lucky this becomes a summer ritual but sometimes it becomes an addiction, you become a perfectionist. All you want to do is not only look good or better but you want to look the best and soon enough that turns into a weight addiction, craving perfection and control and that is a simple one way ticket to an eating disorder.
Nevertheless you’re not the only one at fault here. A summer body is a construct that not only media has created but also friends, families, society. It has manifested itself into that one detail that is engraved in everyone’s mind and simply cannot go away.
A lot of the time when you ask someone that one question ‘why is it so damn important that I look good to everyone?’ or ‘why do I have to be skinny?’ or even ‘why do I have to dress like this to please him/her?’ you get a very similar and familiar answer to each question which is ‘you’re doing it for yourself, when you look good you feel good’.
However, this is one of the most popular and dishonest lies that one can say. Simply because when you have to force someone to think that they need to look a certain way to look good, they’re not doing it for themselves. When you’re saying that the perfect weight for a girl this shape is whatever number you’re thinking of , they’re not doing it for themselves. When you’re telling a guy that having abs and biceps are the only ways ‘to get girls’ instead of having a personality, they’re not doing it for themselves anymore.
Summer is when most people become the most insecure in their year because of the expectations that are placed upon us , and the so-called competition and the transformations that we need to have and the new people that need to like us and the body that we need to get. Summer is the worst season for confidence because it makes you think that confidence is only about your exterior and impressing everyone around you with it.
Confidence isn’t about looks , confidence is understanding that no matter what and no matter who you are – your job isn’t to look good and have every person chase after you. It’s not about turning heads or getting people wet , it’s about yourself. It’s about knowing that you’re all you got and you need to love yourself because there’s only one of you and that’s better than most. It’s about knowing that you don’t owe anyone anything and the more you love yourself , the happier you’ll be and the more enjoyment you’ll have.
Learn to love yourself because your body, mind and soul are indescribable.