10 Things We Should Stop Romanticizing

By: Mariam Touny

Romanticizing things has become a very popular trend nowadays, and it descended from dancing in the rain and cheesy rom coms to fangirl-ing over mass murderers and taking alcoholics as role models. Romanticizing things and idealizing certain aspects of something that shouldn’t be warps one’s view on them and may take a toll on one’s mental health.

1. “The Good Old Days”

Cause who wouldn’t love to go back to the roaring 20’s or the 50’s, with the film noirs and poodle skirts. You seem to forget the racism, sexism, domestic violence, and shitty healthcare that accompanied them. There is no better or safer era to be living in than this one. If it is the pretty dresses you want, you can find them here without all the problematic bullsh*t that can get in the way of your freedom. You won’t enjoy the past unless you’re a straight, white, neurotypical male. 🙂 (come @ me)

 

2. Substance Abuse

Drinking, smoking, or doing drugs because it’s ‘cool’ is most certainly not cool. Making them out to be some sort of rites of passage for the ‘cool kids’ has serious consequences on one’s health and daily life.

 

3. Crime

That bad boy who vandalised school property and smoked in class is not cute. Romanticising this type of people overlooks the fact that they harm others and don’t exist for your wild fantasies. This also applies to crime lords, school shooters, serial killers, and villians that have done horrible, irredeemable things, but y’all still overlook it because they’re tortured souls, lone wolfs or were in so deeply in love (*cough cough* snape *cough cough*).

 

4. Mental Illness

@ the people who think depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, OCD, or any other mental illness or disability is adorable or cute: kindly go f*ck yourselves, because I did not have to go through panic attacks, manic episodes, and severe mood swings, all the while questioning my sanity because oh god why can’t I just accomplish the simplest of tasks without breaking down or shaking for you to call it cute. People do not suffer on the daily and feel ashamed of speaking up about it for you to call it cute or use it on a daily basis, because no, you do not have OCD because something out of line makes you mildly uncomfortable, and no, you are not bipolar because you were sobbing two minutes ago and are pissing sunflowers and confetti now, okay? Great. Just a little PSA.

 

5. Eating Disorders

When flat stomachs that are products of days of starving and frequent visits to the toilets ‘brave’ and ‘beautiful’, you know that humanity has f*cked up. Shoving your fingers up your throat to trigger your gag reflex and empty your stomach’s contents into the toilet’s mouth, with snot, saliva, and tears running down your face is not beautiful. Spending days on end without a pinch of food and becoming a shell of who you are for the sake of being seen as worthy of love is not beautiful. It is a painful and scarring experience that should in no way be encouraged by a society capable of empowering us for who we are. (buy ur appetite suppressing lollipops now!!1!1!!1!!11!)

 

6. Poverty

Living on the streets and always being on the move because you literally have no place to stay or enough money to afford such a place. It isn’t something cool or adventurous and it’s something millions around the world suffer from, and it’s usually people who haven’t experienced poverty who romanticize it. That’s almost always how it is with other issues. This distorted version of reality is doing more harm than good.

 

7. Suicide

The media is largely in control of what society views and thinks, including the romanticization and glorification of suicide, and the promotion of movies and shows that make it out to be a cool thing to do. (you know who) And the idea of death being this beautiful final destination that you finally get to arrive at, is absolute bullsh*t. Do you want to tell me that a suicidal person thinks that death is a romantic escape from this sh*tty f*cking reality? No, they just want to end their suffering and they need help, not encouragement.

 

8. Toxic Relationships

Some of us are suckers for romance, including me, and the media never fails to cater to our needs, but we have to draw the red line that it doesn’t pass. Beyond that line stands 50 shades of grey, which portrays love as an abusive man who uses a young woman to quench his sexual needs; behind it is the ultimate power couple: The Joker and Harley Quinn. The Joker is a manipulative piece of sh*t who tortures his toy, who just thinks he does it out of love. So does the media. So does everyone. They’re not cute. Their relationship is disgusting, and romanticizing it may be a reason behind why some abused women think it’s normal when their s.o’s abused them because it’s a sign they cared about them. :)))))))))))

 

9. Success

New car; big house; sh*t load of money; well paying job; successful and attractive spouse; two beautiful children, all at the ripe old age of 22. (lookin at you, twitter) Success isn’t a tangible thing you can universally agree on. It is the accomplishment of a goal that is important to you. It isn’t all those superficial things, and though that may be it for you, it isn’t for everyone and it shouldn’t be, and you shouldn’t misjudge someone whose vision of success is not similar to yours or society’s.

 

10. Love

Yep. That’s right. We romanticize so many things, including love itself. Now, not to be cynical or anything, but true love doesn’t exist. Before the hopeless romantics come at me, let me say that love is not this magical thing that just happens to you and turns your life upside down – in a good way. It’s a thing you work for; a responsibility, just like marriage. It’s nothing like in the movies. Also, this obsession with finding ‘the one’ that everyone is mulling over, let me tell you in on a secret. …It doesn’t exist either. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Bummer, I know. It doesn’t exist because the probability that a person out there is 100% compatible with you is very slim, and your probability of finding them is even slimmer, BUT! there are thousands of people who, under certain circumstances, would be perfect for you. You may not find ‘the one’, simply because too many ‘the one’s exist for you, just in varying degrees of perfection.

One thought on “10 Things We Should Stop Romanticizing

  1. I’ve been a fan of this whole idea of teen times , but that doesn’t meen I love everything written in it .
    You’re saying that porn is not wrong but let me tell you it’s only from your point of view !! If it is not wrong so why people are doing it “secretly” in Egypt or even in other countries . If it’s not wrong so why Allah said “و الذين هم لفروجهم حافظون الا علي أزواجهم او ما ملكت أيمانهم فإنهم غير ملومين فمن ابتغي وراء ذلك فأولئك هم العادون ” this is from Islam point of view .
    Here’s is from Christian point of view “يشوع ابن سيراخ الحكيم: “وَالإِنْسَانُ الَّذِي يَتَعَدَّى عَلَى فِرَاشِهِ، قَائِلًا فِي نَفْسِهِ: «منْ يَرَانِي؟» حَوْلِيَ الظُّلْمَةُ وَالْحِيطَانُ تَسْتُرُنِي، وَلاَ أَحَدَ يَرَانِي؛ فَمَاذَا أَخْشَى؟ إِنَّ الْعَلِيَّ لاَ يَذْكُرُ خَطَايَايَ. وَهُوَ إِنَّمَا يَخَافُ مِنْ عُيُونِ الْبَشَرِ، وَلاَ يَعْلَمُ أَنَّ عَيْنَيِ الرَّبِّ أَضْوَأُ مِنَ الشَّمْسِ عَشَرَةَ آلاَفِ ضِعْفٍ؛ فَتُبْصِرَانِ جَمِيعَ طُرُقِ الْبَشَرِ، وَتَطَّلِعَانِ عَلَى الْخَفَايَا. هُوَ عَالِمٌ بِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَبْلَ أَنْ يُخْلَقَ؛ فَكَذلِكَ بَعْدَ أَنِ انْقَضَى. فَهذَا يُعَاقَبُ فِي شَوَارِعِ الْمَدِينَةِ، وَحَيْثُ لاَ يَظُنُّ، يُقْبَضُ عَلَيْهِ، وَيُهَانُ مِنَ الْجَمِيعِ، لأَنَّهُ لَمْ يَفْهَمْ مَخَافَةَ الرَّبِّ”.
    And of course if this was a right thing religions wouldn’t have mentioned it in the book of bible and in the Quran saying that it’s right .
    I totally understand your point of view and I respect it but before you state it and support people that’s it’s not wrong and healthy and all of this , make sure that God who’s point of view is much more important than you and me and everyone else , is the same as your point of you to be able to support people to do something. -Aya Sorour

    Liked by 1 person

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