I’m an Overthinker

By: Zainh Alfi

We all get moments of haze in our life.
Moments were we wish everything could be clear.
Why can’t I figure it out?
Why doesn’t it make sense?
Why can’t I focus on something that makes me feel
Feel anything.
Maybe im not meant to know
Maybe im not meant to understand any of this.
Maybe my head is boggled because if it wasnt i’d think more than i already do
I dont think theres an inch left in my head for any more thoughts
I think to suppress other thoughts
How is that suppose to make me feel better?
Running away from all my problems by creating different problems
Only ends up feeling heavier
The constant chatter and repetition of words in my head. Will it ever stop?
I’ve lost touch with reality. Ive lost control.
Nothing is a way out
Not people
Not time
Not love. Or what I keep telling my self might be love.
Whats my way out?
I need a grasp on reality but what is reality?
Could anyone explain?
Time to wake up. Time to get out of the tornado I call life.

This piece is a bit of an insight into the mind of an over-thinker. A mind that gets consumed by thoughts and wonders with no way of suppress. An over thinker who loses touch with reality and lives in a world of pure illusions. Thinking is never bad, yet it’s only useful in moderation. A world where thinking is moderate is only a world of dreams to an over-thinker. Alan watts once said “watch the flow of water when it crosses over an area of land and you will see that it puts out fingers and some of then stop because they come into blind alleys. The water doesn’t pursue that course, it simply rises and then it finds a way it can go, but it never uses any effort rather it relies gravity. It takes the line of least resistance and eventually finds a course. Now we shall do the same thing, we shall view our obstacles and blind alleys as a way for us to branch out and find other paths without the use of effort. But its always easier said than done, so can an over-thinker ever achieve peace?

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