Why #NotAllMen Is Absolute Bullshit

By: Farah Dessouky

“Women are scared to walk down the street”

“98% of women have been sexually harassed”

“Women’s emotions are constantly invalidated under the name of hormones”

“Less than 5% of women worldwide are in leadership positions”

“At the current rate, it’ll take 217 years to close the economic gender gap.”

“One third of girls in the developing world are married before the age of 18 and 1 in 9 are married before the age of 15”

“I out of 10 rape victims in the US is a male”

Side note: I will not be putting sources because the existence of such phenomenon is much more important than a stupid number.

All these shocking facts dismissed in a second, by men who have a “feeling” that feminism is more of an anti-men movement than a pro-equality and pro-choice movement. That itching feeling stops them from being advocates against rape, sexual harassment, gender pay gap, even male rape victims! And if that isn’t the definition of selfishness honestly I don’t know what is. Their fears of losing their privileges are apparently more important than women dying as a result of domestic abuse because of sexism…

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So let me get straight to the point, here’s why the “not all men” argument raises my blood pressure:

1. You happily don’t mind when the stereotype is positive

From claiming that “all” men drive better to believing that again “all men are better performers in leadership positions and the list goes on… I almost never see a guy countering these stereotypes as much as I see guys arguing to death that they never harassed a girl. But guess what if you never did this; this is not an opportunity for praise! Since when is being a decent human being a plus? So whether you like it or not and whether you promote these stereotypes or not you do benefit from them.

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2. Complicit

“Often complicit” so what does that mean exactly? You could be a good guy respectful and all, but still be in the wrong. When your friend is being a sexist asshole, disrespecting women, telling a sexist “joke” while you are laughing and nodding you are part of the problem. Your neutrality here and “wana maly” is contributing to the problem. So you should start being anti-sexism not just the silent dude tagging along.

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3. Derailment

Obviously we are fully aware as feminists that men aren’t inherently sexist because duh there are male feminists however the “not all men” argument is used as a way to silence feminists and invalidate their experiences with the men who are actually shitty. If every man said not all men no one will be responsible… Which is, sadly, not the case.

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So lastly instead being busy whining all men and not all men let’s focus on the real problem, inequality; females feeling unsafe, suppression of men’s feelings and the list may go on forever unless we do something about these issues.




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