A Message to Every Girl Who Says “3ayza Asaheb”

By: Lana Hazem

For some odd and unknown reason, relationship topics seem to follow me around like a lost dog, this one bezaat baa I had to write about.

Tab3an we all know that I’m the Queen of relationship fails and I’m definitely not ashamed to say that.

Le ayy bent 2alet, betfakar, hatfakar aw fakaret enaha 3ayza tesaheb, simply, mengher esa2et adab ya3ny, enty homara. We lel 3amla feeha baa “I don’t need a man to be happy”, mengher ma tez3aly meny, enty kadaba.

I know en ba3d ma tekouni et2alabty gedeed men wahed hatkouni msh tay2a enek tet2elby tany, bas after like a month tops, hatesma3i sout keda soghayar fe demaghek bey2oul “ana nefsy had yhebeny” “what if this time he’s sincere” howa el sout ebn el kalb dah el beylabessna fel 7eit.

W haga mohema le kol bent fi this position; if he’s an ex, don’t fucking do it. Benezbaly, ana bashouf eno ex’s getting back together is just a recipe for disaster, be friends, bas don’t try rekindling something that blew up in your face the first time, ya3ni he hurt you once he’s going to hurt you again, we give multiple chances okay, bas msh tefarkesho w terga3o that’s just plain dumb. W lel walad baa 3alshan mansash, abl ma tfarkesh eb2a make up your damn mind, ya3ni matgish ba3daha b a month w t2olaha i want you back, momken a week bas a month leh inshallah she’s not going to wait kol dah, even if she still thinks about you every damn day, we do have a pride zayoko (or so i’d like to think).

As we all know, guys don’t have attachment issues zayenna keda, ya3ni they don’t even know what being attached to someone means so he’s not going to mind you not talking to him ever again, he might miss you sometimes bas he won’t go out of his way eno yekalemek tany 3ashan you know their ego can’t stand that.

W en enty to3ody tkalmeeh baa w tehebi feeh, you’re boosting his ego aktar men ma howa boosted asslan w btedeilo eema aktar mn nafsso w dah ghalat 3ala el mogtama3 3alshan fy nas msh adra testa7mel w betetfe2e3 mel hagat dy -me.

Even though I do sometimes fall for a guy w I give him my all, after ma el mawdou3 beywala3 odami, bafou2 keda w a3raf eny kont motakhaleffa w eny makansh elmafroud akoun laz2a w mohn.

So, why would you want to be lied to, cheated on, laughed upon and made a complete fool? It’s pointless.

Ma howa nefakar ma3 ba3d, en enty t-devote yourself to a guy who isn’t really sure about you w has commitment issues, yeb2a you’re going to have zero dignity and you’re going to hurt yourself in the process of trying to work something out with him, w fel akher, haye3mel el howa 3ayzo w yekot.

So, I might sound like i’m against dating bas I’m actually not, like, have fun with whoever the hell you want, you don’t have to date. Bas if you’re going to do that don’t let people judge you and don’t be affected by their words, bas only date the one you’re positive en he’s good for you.

Simple shit on who to date:

  1. Be friends for a good period of time first, ya3ny never date a guy el howa men el awel konto betzabato, khaly el haga teegy keda el howa be friends first for like 3 months then fakaro f haga tanya, actually get to know each other.
  2. Don’t date wahed som3eto sab2a omo -I’m not going to explain you know what i mean damn well.
  3. Date someone you trust begad.
  4. Date someone who gets you -and vice versa of course.
  5. Date someone who meets your standards – not less.
  6. Make a checklist keda w hoteelo check 3ala kol haga he’s got men your list.
  7. Date someone who makes you feel a specific way keda that you only feel with him.

I said everything there is to say, take care and don’t fall in love; be cold hearted keda.

Lilo out xx

One thought on “A Message to Every Girl Who Says “3ayza Asaheb”

  1. Well, first things first I’d like to start by saying that I’ve searched your entire article for anything I can agree with but unfortunately my search bore no fruit. Now there’s nothing wrong with stating your opinion publicly on an article but when you start advicing people with your opinion then I am bound to say something. I’m sorry your experience with guys hasn’t been a success story, truly there is not the slightest of sarcasm in my tone, I know how men can be. But you’re no angels yourself either. See I used to be one of those guys ‘ el som3eto sab2a omo ‘ and we weren’t friends for three months or none of that. I got her number from a friend and started dating on the phone without even seeing each other, I changed for her, never cheated on her or any of that. I was most loyal, caring and understanding. If you had a check list for a man suitable for dating I probably wouldn’t fall under any of those categories, yet I treated her like royalty only to have her crush my heart into a thousand pieces via her hands. Did my ‘ ego ‘ prevent me from telling her I want her back and still miss her? I begged her for weeks and when she refused, I’d wait a month or two before trying again. I had to go see a therapist to save me from falling off the edge of this cliff called depression. I was what you would describe as a ‘ playboy ‘ who changed for a girl I’ve never even seen face to face(at the time, we started seeing after each other during the relationship don’t worry). Her friends were always jealous of her telling her things like ‘ I want my next boyfriend to be like yours ‘, hell i was such a good boyfriend her mom gave her a hell of a hard time for breaking up with me. But here we are, no good deed goes unpunished right? Men are assholes but so are women and please don’t say things like more men cheat and all of that nonesense. The problem isn’t gender related, it’s human nature. Do I blame the rest of the community of women around the world for the atrocities dealt to me by their own kind? No. I blamed no one and moved on, hell when my friends ask me if I could go back in time would I prevent it from happening? My answer remains the same: no. It’s not that I still love her, I got over her a long time ago. I just wouldn’t be who I am if it weren’t for her and I like myself just fine right now. So this is a message from a friendly human being just to let you reflect on things a little bit, hopefully see things in a different light. Have a lovely day.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.