خبر عاجل: مقتل ١٠٠٠ موقع بورنو و اصابة تورنت

By: Lana Hazem and Fadila Khaled

First things first – a7eih. While in any country this should be applauded, glorified even, fi masr, action zay da yesabbeb 40 youm 7edad w lebs eswed. Let us explain: It all started 3 – 4 days ago…

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Kan fi walad – ta3alo nesammeeh Ramez – a3ed 3ala sereero met3assab, uslo kan lessa afel ma3 sa7beto of one year w shaklohom kda hayefarkesho, fa 2al yeraffah 3an nafso shwayya. He picked up his laptop w qarrar yefta7 pornhub but it won’t open, fakas 2al yegarrab Thumbzilla, bardo same thing. He went to check his TE Data router, bas el net shaghal. Rah kallem so7abo w sa2alhom fi eh…

 

Fi nafs el wa2t kan Abdel Basset a3ed 3al cybar fi eido el job bas allaho a3lam kan raqam kam youmeiha, usl ahlo kano menakkedeen 3aleih, fa 2al yefta7 ay mawqe3 porn yetsalla abl ma yerooh li merato el awwalaneyya, bas el site mabyefta7sh, tab3an law Abdel Basset makansh mastool kan hayes2al 7ad, bas howwa habeeby haram kan msh mazboot khales, fa awwel amma rawwa7 nezel fi merato darb…

 

3am 3awadein bawab villa 117, kano sohab el beit barra w howa khalas sa2y el zar3 w ghaseel el 3arabeyat w msh la2y haga ye3melha, fa fata7 howa kaman one of the many porn websites, Bas bardo, msh beyeftaho. 3awadein estaghrab, a3ad yeshtem f sohab el beit en homa me3afeneen w msh beyedfa3o el fatoura, ra7 le 3am Ragab bawab villa 118 3alshan yesra2 net, Bas 3am Ragab kan 3ando nafss 7alet 3am 3awadein w homa el etnein msh 3arfeen yeftaho haga, fa a3ado weshohom f wesh ba3d bi kobaytein shay msh 3arfein ye3melo eh.

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Ba3d el darba dy, hassalet haga tanya, Omar kan beyhawel ye3mel download li a Torrent file, mafysh haga radya tenzel -ya Sobhan Allah- wala movies, wala ay haga. He tried to change the vpn yemken it’s not available in Egypt, hatta el vpn msh shaghal -Tab so2al Bas, eh el shaghal?

 

Do you know what they all had in common? TE Data routers. Apparently, TE Data bi salamet-ha blocked kol el porn sites, torrent, and vpn’s – yadi el 7osa. El mohem, there is only one thing we can expect from this – an increase fi rates el 7erman w el ta7arosh – uslaha kanet na2sa. 7atta el 7aga el waheeda elly kanet mesabbara el reggala el masreya etdafanet, kan nefsena ne2olloko ya banat etnaqqabo bas kollena 3arfeen en 7atta law laffeen 7awaleiko 7adeed, hateb2o victims of sexual harassment bardo. Ba3eedan 3an da baa.

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We swear to you, mafysh had feena ma2a3adsh at least sa3a 3ala el telefon mestanny ay action men el customer service. Awel Level fel customer service howa gomlet “bel raga2 al entezar al mandoubein mashgholeen al2an, amamak 10 daka2ek” w el 10 da2aye2 doul msh bey3ado, w lama rabena yefregha w yerodo, msh beye3raf ye7el el moshkela w bey2adem “shakwa” sa3etha baa kolena benelga2 le ser2et el net mel geran.

 

Amma el streaming? Ya gamalo. El nas el tabe3eya betetfarag 3ala a movie in about 2 hours max. La, moshtarek te-data beyetfarag 3al film b steps; step 1: load the movie for around an hour. Step 2: efta7 7etta men el movie w seebo y-load tany. Step 3: ebda2 forga, el website hay-crash midway through the movie. Perfect life begad.

 

Yaani makansh kefaya 3ala TE Data el service el neila w el streaming el araf, la 7abaket yedahwaro mawqef el shabab el masry el 7assas zeyada. Yalla, 3aleih el 3awad w menno el 3awad – w rabbena yostor.

 

Ma3 ta7eyyat rowwad el 7a2 lel regal el ma7rooma,

Lana w Fadila

P.S TE Data please mate2ta3eesh 3annena el net ehna benhazzar wallahi – bgd.

7 thoughts on “خبر عاجل: مقتل ١٠٠٠ موقع بورنو و اصابة تورنت

  1. Howa 3abatko wesel lel daragadi howa ehh el ghaba2 el ento betektebo da a7a el moshkela en ento moslemeen el katbeen kda w ehh msh wa7da feko kanet mo7agaba bardo? Wla da ashan ya 7aram el regala msh la2yeen websites porn yekhrebet el 3alimko w fahimko en ento mmkn ti2olo 7ga zay de ro7o 3asharo 3la ba3d w khalas

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